Hi lovies!

First things first! Happy women’s month. I’ve been MIA but I’m back and I’m better now *chuckles* and there’s something that has been on my mind for the past couple of weeks that I’d like to share with you and perhaps get your take on the matter.

Have you ever heard the saying, ” you can’t give what you don’t have” or “you can’t pour from an empty cup” ? I’d like to believe that I am a generous person and seeing other people happy gives me joy and being able to make someone’s day better makes me happy. With that said, I like many other people would go out of my way just to help a dear friend or be there for them. I really hate seeing someone sad knowing that I could cheer them up and yet I’m not. But where do we draw the line which defines what we can and cannot do for others. Would saying “no” to people make us mean,uncaring and unemphatic? Would that make us selfish and horrible friends?

I do understand that we have to look after ourselves and make sure that we a healthy in every possible way, be it mentally, emotionally and physically. Thus the saying “you can’t give what you don’t have” . You cannot offer emotional support while you’re running on empty and you are on the verge of a breakdown. You cannot be physically there for your loved ones while you aren’t well or while you are going through an ailment,especially if its contagious. So my question now is : at what point do you stop everything, put everyone else needs aside and focus solely on yourself?

When do you realise that you have to start focusing on yourself and you have to put yourself first? Do you deem it as being selfish or is it a necessity that you can’t do without? I think that this is something that a lot of people have a hard time dealing with so please tell me down below in the comments section, how do you say “nope I’m focusing on me” or how do you let a loved one know that you cannot be of assistance because you might have your own issues/problems to tackle.

Peace,love and light😘😘


10 thoughts on “Am I being selfish or reasonable?

  1. I think taking time out is reasonable at times, loved ones should be able to love you even during your worst times. Good advice or help is better coming from a healthy heart than a bitter one, otherwise you’ll help people and get poorer emotionally or physically. Fix yourself first before you fix others

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Thanks for th advice 😍😍It’s what I always ask myself all the time.But at the end of the day I always conclude that am just being selfish.Because as of myself I find mysef in situation where I always put other people before me to a point were I kind of forget that I have myself to take care of.If I don’t do that i just feel that am selfish.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey girl πŸ™‹πŸ˜
      Bruh I feel that way too.. But I’m working on it,we gotta take care of ourselves boo. We can’t give,give and give without refueling and recharging.. We got this MmeπŸ˜…

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi Miss Lekula, thanks for your insightful article. Its reminds me of what Jesus said In Math 22: 39-“Love your neighbor as u love yourself” meaning u cannot love others until u love yourself. Here loving yourself does not mean being selfish, its about placing the appropriate value upon your life that God has placed. So in our lives we need to know striking a balance between caring for others and ourselves. Its very easy, Jesus prayed a lot for people but he also knew when it was time for him to refuel that is the reason he regularly took out time alone to go pray so he can recharge. Even in school they were times i helped other students in subjects i excelled at however i also knew when it was time for me to study on my own. Its just a matter of balance!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I understand where you are coming from. Its a bit tricky. Let’s just say giving on its own is a sacrifice, you sacrifice what you have for the benefit of others. And as you sacrifice out of love, not to be seen or loved, the Lord Jesus will take care of all your needs. We are a channel of wealth/blessings/happiness tp our world. Until you realise that, it is always gona br hard for you to give. We need to acknowledge that we are not made for ourselves but we are coworkers with God. His responsibility is our responsibility.

    Mme hela, eish people take advantage of us at times. Sometimes friends and other times family. And they would make you feel bad if you say Next Tym please, I gotta pay my bills first, or even tithe. Infact they can even give you a lecture gore hewe hewe take care of us and God will open his door blessings for you.

    You can’t be looking broke and say its coz u are taking care of others. So Darling you arent reasonable.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Ms Kells πŸ™‚
      tlhemma, that is true.. giving is indeed a sacrifice and it should be done wholeheartedly.
      i guess he who waters others will also be watered right?
      thanks for sharing your thoughts with me ..Xoxoxo


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